Now Life is a Dance

Yeah I had to post another one and the only reason for this one is that a song a neighbor played all evening to enjoyment of seeing that everyone heard it played repetitively throughout his repertoire that particular day, but never the less I thought about how closely it related to another blog and so I put them all together and it seems that there are as many descriptions for life and how we each see and I am sure that the list will increase as each minutes tic away writing about it. So without further adieu and not much anticipation on your part I have now learned that life is also a dance. The line in the chorus was what made me realise that maybe life may be closer to being an anagram that the ride we all view it as all basically meant the same thing, just using a different word to describe it and then those words strung together again are even a more discriptive anagram of each own's meaning and spelling and all meaning the same thing.

I am sure you can each see why I have come to this conclusion. So let's see what we have here, we have life is like a dance or a roller coaster or maybe it is closer to a box of chocolates and you may never find that unless you take a bite into life, you may never "savour" the taste of life or then it could be that it is a roller coaster because it is full of highs, pitfalls and those pesky curves life so aimlessly throw at us with such precision our paranoia encreases until one day the ride stops and redirects our attention to other possibilities that life could be described as and it coud be more like a hot air balloon ride. Steadily ascending going to great heights and if done properly slowly descending in a controlled manor and learning to live with those little those pesky little crosswinds that seem always to at our back that realize that maybe that it could be just like a dance, but that would mean that you would have to view it the same way and how often has that ever really happened that two individuals would ever see the same exact thing each other really saw in something. If I were a betting man I would decline the bet, because the odds of that ever happening were stacked against the one who thought that the thought was a possibility.

Now this is where it gets complicated because dance is a pretty descriptive art form and you have many forms of dance. Yes life could be viewed as a dance, after all there are times you just seem to glide across life's plains doing a waltz, which even that art form has its on sub forms or variations in which you glide and they too have their merits. Within each of the waltz's sub forms, like the Tennessee Waltz or even the waltz that takes you across Texas is more of a regional for of the same dance, just slightly altered for a different audience. And there you are waltzing with one hand on her waist, the delicate glove covered hand giving her soft small hand a cradle. And effortlessly gliding along life's dance floor.

Maybe the Argentine Tango with its serpentine movements and heat it generates as your passion builds and two fiery souls are synchronous with each step, with each gyration of the dance there evolves to an even more seductive mistress that hints at ecstasy awaits only finds that he forgot his protection, (I was going to use Body Condom, I have been wanting to find something to write about in order to use it...) but when I reflectively looked back it really didn't sound right using as an adjective or pronoun are a noun now that I think about it, (notice how even here, used differently to describe the same thing like the word describe itself) your final disappointment related to a body condom, but rather as the idea they forgot their protection, because then that itself is another anagram within an anagram. Protection could be used to describe a whole host of things, not prepared, unable to accept, never realized, never thought about it, didn't give it a second thought, see this could go on for quite some time, so I will just take it for granted that you are following this and move on. Deciding on the proper use and the encompassing definition in the ability to describe this event, protection and forgetting it basically means we are never really protected from anything determined to get at us. But then again, it could be more like the twist, the funky monkey, the groove, the jerk, all different but none the less a dance. God forbid that Disco ever gets to rise from its grave. A dance is a dance is a dance, just slight variations in some, and the others as different salt is from sugar, but we use them as a dance.

Intimacy in the dance, slowly swaying, slight touch of others in your life as your various partners in life or people who just cut-in. The closeness that you are not alone, the secureness you feel in the embrace as you spin and twirl, a slight touch to let you know they are there too.

But even our tastes in dance change and we find that closeness we once enjoyed disappate slowly and feel you are dancing apart, seemingly indifferent to the other's emotional state and our dance morphs into something less intimate but still close enough if you felt you were drifting too far,it was still insight and you still remembered the steps.

So until you find yourself so disassociated that you might as well be dancing alone and more like a pinball that ricochets from event to event in their lives. Then the story takes a whole other turn if we go the pinball route, after all I do want you to read this post through and not start yawning as your head bobs up in down like it is a barbiturate in the visual sense of the meaning of the post, so we will stay away from the arcade games and continue the dance. So after only a slight diversion we are back to the dance but you realize that the steps to the waltz had been forgotten and only the Watusi, the pony and swim were the only steps you knew now and they were totally void of any intimacy and the only pleasant thing about them, as you gyrated your way around the dance floor your partners were constantly changing. Now some could see that as a plus, a benefit, a windfall, (see how all three words just described the same thing?) and others would see it as being to roguish, crude, animalistic, barbarian, egotistacal, (again using words that could describe the same thing) as you danced through life. And then again I solidify my statement that people are just not going to see it quite the same as the other. But yet we dance because that is how we see life with its numerous styles, movements and beats, we just keep looking for that step that allows you to dance at your own beat through life.

Yes maybe a dance with all its indifferences it is all basically the same, our movement through life and how we see it or how hungry we are with those box of chocolates or how excited we feel as we ride the coaster, each having its own place and without arguement each used to describe one's life with just as a vivid palet as the other, they all satisfy the need for intimacy, objectiveness, independence, indifference and just as fuild or rigid as the steps dictate, we dance through it, what we dance is the choice of the dancer, let's see how many follow exactly the step your are doing. That would almost be like seeing the same thing at the same moment by two completely and unique only to themselves people acually mergining and becoming as one in unison! It would be like, well you know Chemistry, a universal event and when hasn't mans intervention and his constantly changing things so it adapted to him and he danced a new dance, which is closer to possibility than that anyone ever sees things the same. It is in our nature to live life as we see fit and adapting when need or rather changing your step in order to avoid or maybe be slightly out of step. Did you ever think that it could happen? The closest we dance to anyone is close enough to feel that intimacy, yet far enough to keep our toes from being stepped on.

Well there is always that predictability of the yoyo concept, now whose life doesn't have its ups and downs?

Later...


Stories posted here are the exclusive property of the Smiling Pig. No other use or reproduction of the content contained here is permissible without written prior consent.

Chucking it All

Ever feel like chucking it all? Like if the effort is not really worth the outcome and you wondered why you even tried at all? I am sure we all get that way at times and we just feel like walking away from it all. So we view it from a distance and try to see it in a different perspective, from an angle more appeasing and then try to understand in a more constructive role and as a third party instead of the one involved in it or feeling as if you were. But there are times that no matter how you look at it, it does not change, it remains the same and you have that gut instinct that what you feel is right, so you just throw your hands up and walk away from it, because you know that no matter what you do or say it is not going to change one iota. You have to leave it where it lies and let time work it out. If there is a chance for change, it will happen and if not then why worry about it?

Life is full of these situations, some see them as challenges while others seem them as stumbling blocks. Ones that see the challenge in it will take it head on and try to figure out why and then try to resolve it, but their resolution is usually to the effect that they can understand it and accept it in their way or to their benefit and not as it was composed to be. Those that see it as a stumbling block will try to avoid it altogether, try and find a way around so as not to be affected by it, but this is like a mole in their hole trying to avoid a flood coming in their direction, inevitably they are going to find themselves struggling with it only to eventually be pulled down.

So as life goes, so come conflicts, confusion and chaos, but it is within these things that confront us that we can find order and a peace of being as we learn to understand and accept. The only constant in life is change and it is how we learn to adapt to change that will determine our survival and survival depends on how we accept and understand those changes or cycles we go through.

When in a river it is much easier to swim with the flow than to be constantly swimming against it. I am not saying that we should always conform to what others feel is right, there are times when we need to try and swim against the flow of the status quo, because as an individual you can affect the change, even rivers have been known to change their course over time and change can start with one thought.

Is it wise to always confront conflict? It really depends on your beliefs, I was taught to"pick your battles" and to go prepared for both victory and defeat. If we find ourselves constantly confronting conflict, always finding something wrong, then in the process we may miss what is good and never realise it may have been wiser to have offered a bit more understanding and only try and change those things which over shadowed the good in it. There has never been a bad idea only bad planning. Not saying you should ride a skate board in rush hour traffic, just saying we need to learn at times when the smarter thing to do is yield. Time can change it, change is inevitable and sooner or later as it is said, your time will come.

So maybe chucking it for a while, shelving it temporarily until the time is right and the enviroment is condusive, revisit it, look at it again and see if it is worth the effort to spend any time on it to try and change it.

Later...

Stories posted here are the exclusive property of the Smiling Pig. No other use or reproduction of the content contained here is permissible without written prior consent.

Life as a YoYo

Some say life is like a roller coaster, with all the thrills it entails, sudden drops that plummet so quickly you lose your breath and turns so sharp that you feel you are going to be ejected from your seat. Thrills, spills, laughter and the fear associated with the unexpected related to life and what we experience in it. Then there is Forrest Gump, whose mama taught him that life was like a box of chocolates, you never know what's inside until you bite into it, so many ways that one can express life and all that happens between birth and death and we each see it a bit differently when we look at it and the life that we lead.

As for me, my life seems more like a yoyo, predictable to an extent. Stationary, going up and down, like pendulem going back and forth keeping rhythm with the passing of time only mine is going up and down without the unexpected thrills of not knowing what is next, a sudden drop from a great height or what is around the next curve. At my apex I have a broad view of all that is around me and very little is hid from my sight, then at my lowest point all I can see is what is in front of me. Up and down it seems my life has been going for so long now. No surprises, nothing that excites me as it used to and nothing to look forward to as I once before did.

Some would say I was in nothing more than a rut, life repeating itself day after day, but a rut is linear, a depression in the ground and the more traveled the deeper it gets until you lose all periphery sight and all you have is what you see before you and what you left behind, but at least a rut isn't stationary, you are heading is some direction. But a yoyo goes nowhere in any real since of the meaning and what is sadder that being a yo yo I do not even control the ups and downs I experience, someone else masters the string to which the yoyo is anchored to and it is only by their their will that determines the velocity of the ascent or decent.

Sometimes I wish that string would break and send me off across life's plains in some erratic manner, uncontrolled, exciting, not knowing what is over the next rise or around the next bend instead of this constant up and down where all I see is what I have seen so many times before. Could it be just a factor of my age or that complacency has relegated me to this point in life.

Should I complain about this? Am I wearing my heart on my sleeve? I have been on that roller coaster of life before and I have experienced the thrills of the unexpected and the tickle in my stomach as I feel as if I am floating when velocity seems void as from being dropped from a great height and then suspended. I had that something in my life to look forward to and all the surprises it held in store for me and I looked forward to each and every turn, hill, thrill each day, but it seems I stepped off the roller coaster and can't find my way back again, even thought I have looked countless times before.

Up and I down I have seemed to go and no surprises I have encountered, no scenery that I have not seen before. All is quiet, no screams, gasps or laughing as because the unexpected has been taken out of the equation and replaced with the reassuring thought that I will either be going up or down, stationary and going no place.

Anyone up for a ride on a roller coaster?

Distant Isles

On the shores of distant isles

Where the gentle trade wind blows

My thoughts drift and settle for a while

Across my dreams like a river she flows

Beneath the stars that flood the skies

I lay my body down upon the sand

To her like the wind my spirit flies

To feel the soft caress of her hand

Listening to the waves kiss the shore

I close my eyes and her I see

To be with her I go like nights before

But only in my dreams it's meant to be

I feel the breeze upon my face

As soft as her whisper on my ear

It envelopes me like her embrace

Then I feel the fall of my tears

I walk these shores late at night

Searching for the one who walked away

She has run and hides from my sight

She has gone and refused to stay

Upon these shores of distant isles

These sands that I now walk alone

I think of a love that was defiled

I think of a love that now is gone

Underneath the moon's soft glow

Only one shadow touches the sand

Where two danced once long agao

This place where I held her hand

This place I go it tortures me

Yet this is where I find my peace

This place where she used to be

This dream that is my only release

Upon the shores of distant isles

Where the gentle trade wind blows

My thoughts drift and settle a while

Across my dreams like a river she flows

Later...

Stories posted here are the exclusive property of the Smiling Pig. No other use or reproduction of the content contained here is permissible without written prior consent.

A Wonderful Time Has Ended

Today I read the final post of someone who I always enjoyed reading. It was not about the news, latest movie or of how the earth is being destroyed or any personal agenda or vendetta. It was an escape, a chance to have a peek into the life and everyday happenings of someone who is very adept in chiseling with words a beautiful Stella of her life. She will be missed and maybe our lives will be a little emptier without being able to follow her daily exploits and adventures of her life.

When I first met her online I knew then there was something very special about her. She had a way of not just understanding a person, but being able to see through what one was saying and unveiling exactly what needed to be seen. She has a gift to see beyond what is being presented and to peel back the layers until she can get to the heart of what was really troubling someone and revealing those emotions. Never demeaning of another, but sympathetic to their needs and could show an understanding that few could.

She is the kind of person who could give of herself without thought of herself and never expecting anything in return. She gives of herself unselfishly in so many was and always was willing to go beyond what was expected, not out of personal gain or notoriety for what she had done, but rather she saw that there was more she could do to help and unselfishly gave.

So I wish her good fortune on the new path in which she has chosen for herself now and I know without a doubt in whatever her endeavors now lie, she will be successful and recognized for the wonderful person she is.

She will be missed.

Stories posted here are the exclusive property of the Smiling Pig. No other use or reproduction of the content contained here is permissible without written prior consent.

Declination of Moral Values (A personal opinion)

Yesterday was a very reveling day in several ways and it caused me much thought as to my own personal beliefs of how a child should be raised and how society as a whole thinks discipline should be meted out or how a parent should impart moral values and respect to their child.

As I stood in the checkout line at a local department store I witnessed a young boy in a full blown tantrum as his mother stood helplessly by as the child ranted on screaming and yelling at his mom, cursing, telling her that he hated her, that she was a bad mom and he wished that he had a mother who loved him. I was embarrassed for her not because of what the child was doing, but because of what he was publicly putting her through and the sad thing about it was she really could not do anything about except leave the store. She could not properly discipline him in a public place as the young boy should have been, for if she did she could have faced criminal charges.

I thought back to when I was a child and what would have happened to me for such a display in public. First thing that would have happened is that I would have been pulling myself up from the floor after kissing it and hearing my father telling me that "we" would deal with it further when we got home and I can promise you now not another sound would have issued from my mouth, the punishment had already started. Once reaching home I did not have to be told to go to my room, I already knew from past experiences what was expected of me and my father would take his time in his disciplining, he liked the fact I was thinking about what was coming, what I had brought on myself and thinking about what was coming was his way of reinforcing in me that what I did was no one's fault but my own. When he did enter the room he did not sit and talk to me about what I had done wrong and why I should not have done what I did and that what was fixing to take place was going to hurt him far worse than it was going to hurt me. He knew it was going to hurt me and that point was driven home with every swing of the belt and he was very capable of making his point quite clear without words. The only thing that would be said was when he was leaving the room, "Maybe next time you will remember." It rarely happened again if it happened at all.

I am not saying that everything a child does should not be dealt with by corporal punishment, but I do believe that there comes a time when time outs, corner sitting and the taking away of privileges does not work because the child knows that these will be restored and under such punishment a child will just wait it out or divert their attention to something else. A spanking is not as detrimental on a child as some will lead society to believe and it does have a reinforcing action that there will come a point when a child's actions will warrant such discipline. The sad thing again is that society as a whole has turned away from corporal punishment in the home and that I feel is the decline of imparting on a child what their limitations are and have taken away from the parent this tool of last resort in an effort to "bring home" to their child that sometimes in life their actions will attribute to a more serious form of punishment. There are some children that you can talk to until you are blue in the face, until hell freezes over to try and get a point across to them as to why what they have done was wrong and it will only go in one ear and out the other, children have a most unique way of tuning a parent out and an even greater ability to make their parents think that they realize that through their wise words and sagged advice based on their past experiences that they have seen the error of their ways and learned a very valuable lesson from it. In other words they just told their parents what they wanted to hear when in fact all they were thinking was the would be glad when mom or dad had finished wagging their tongues because it was cutting into their social time.

Who is to blame for this? There are several reasons and each compound the other. I personally think it is due to a parent or parents being too lazy or involved in their own life that they fail to accept the responsibility to be a parent. That some do not realize that children are taught by example in a lot of cases and use the old rule "Do as I say, not as I do." and expecting the child to understand and the last reason is that government has set into place laws dictating what is called discipline and what is considered child abuse and the line defining the difference is very vague. They want you to be responsible parents and raise your child to be an acceptable member of society, but do it in such a way that you cannot discipline them in a physical way. It has become sad when a parent is held responsible for their children's action until they turn 18 and it is the parent that will pay for it until then and take away vital tools that have aided a parent for years in the past. In some states if you are held responsible for our child for a crime they have committed, even though you have no history of it yourself, you will pay the restitution and in some states a parent will suffer public humiliation for what their child has done, either by placing them behind a fenced in place in a spot where there is a lot of traffic or they have it placed in the newspaper where it even reaches a broader audience and in some cases they even broadcast it on the television news.

My daughter used to think I did nothing more than wait for her to screw up just to punish her. She seemed to think I got some kind of thrill inflicting pain on her and seeing her cry. I am not saying that she was the perfect child and I bear the scars all parents do when it comes to their children and I have suffered the threats of school counselors for my strict dicsiplining when my daughter told them I was phsically abusing her. I had no problem telling them that they had for 7 hours a day, I had her the rest of the time and as for determining what dicsipline is to implemented depending on what she did or failed to do would be decided by me. I was reminded at that point that charges could be filed on me based solely on my daughter's words and I could be prosecuted. That was when I looked straight at the counselor and told her if she thought she could do a better job I will sign over my responsibilities to my daughter to her and she could decide what was best for her as well as support her and meet her financial needs. That did not set very well and she let me know she had hundreds of children to deal with daily and that was not a practical solution to the problem I was facing. I told her the only problem I could see was that she had no right in telling me how I should raise my child and if she did something that warranted corporal punishment, then I would see to it that corporal punishment was rendered and not check in with her to see if I was doing the proper thing in the dicsiplining of my daughter. On the other hand my daughter also knows that I will not let anyone unduely harm her or suffer someone else's punishment. This she has witnessed many times and knows I am the first to protect her. As he high school principle learned the hard way when she was expelled from school when two other girls decided to jump on her in the halls between classes as he and other teachers stood by and watched. She saw me and the lengths I would go to to see that she was not harmed and I laid the law down to her principle that day as to how he was going to take responsibility for my daughter and her safety and that I woud hold him personally accountable for an harm that came to her up to and including his position in the school, I guess he thought I was bluffing. He no longer works in the Terrrell ISD. I told Kelly at that time that we all have a price to pay for what we do, and he is no less responsible for his actions than she was and when I discipline her it is not because I enjoy it, but because she has done something that is not considered acceptable or wrong. That there are different levels of discipline and she needed to accept that fact in life and learn to deal with it, because what works for one action may not be a sutible punishment for another and she needs to think about and understand the consequences that are involved before she decides to do something that is concidered unaccpetable.

The goevrment has taken it upon themselves to decide what is acceptable punsihment and was is considered child abuse, a public spanking when warranted can cause you great suffering through the legal system. But if we wait for the legal system to apply the appropriate punishment or as to what they think is appropriate, then a parent has lost the battle at the checkout line and they will never have any recourse in deciding exactly what type of punishment a child deserves for their actions.

Spare the rod and spoil the child...

Later...

Stories posted here are the exclusive property of the Smiling Pig. No other use or reproduction of the content contained here is permissible without written prior consent.

Chasing Lizards

The other evening I was lying in bed reading a book that I seem not to be able to finish. One of those books that you want to read just to say you have read it, but then as you start reading it becomes more of a challenge to finish it than it does because you enjoy it.

Anyway, I do not have curtains on my window as I never have seen any that look like they belong on a window, so I keep mini blinds up and a bit spartan in appearance. That evening as I was reading, out of the corner of my eye I noticed something dash across the window screen. At first I just thought it was another nocturnal insect my lamp had attracted, but then I saw it again as it dashed back in the direction it had come. I looked out the window and saw a small brown gecko that had been drawn to the window by the insects that were drawn to the light from my lamp. I sat and watched as he stalked his prey and then in a burst of speed ran towards them and capturing them with its sticky tongue. This continued for quite sometime and soon I found myself slipping back to a time when I was much younger and thought of those warm summer late afternoons when the anoles, chameleions and geckos would start to come out to dine and bask in the last rays of the summer day. A time when life seemed so much easier and not wrought with the confussion, chaos and responsibility that defined being an adult. Those care free days when all I had to worry about was what mom would serve for breakfast the next morning. I did not think much past that, as I knew as the day went along it would change as quickly as the minutes faded and a new adventure would present itself. The one thing though that I enjoyed and looked forward to was chasing lizards. Stalking them as stealthly as they stalked their prey, learning to use one hand to distract them and the other to capture them. Lizards had given me many hours of distraction growing up and a chance to learn about something along the way.

I remember once, my younger brother and I were standing on the porch, I was six and he was five at the time, we were watching our older brother chasing after a skink, we called them racing lizards because of the stripes that went the full length of their body. Eventually my older brother triumphed over the lizard as he smiling face had revealed and he walked over to the porch to show us his prize. As he stepped up on the porch he tripped over the middle step and dropped the lizard, this is where the story takes a turn for the worst, well at least for me it did. The lizard froze the moment it landed on the concrete and as my older brother attempted to recapture it the lizard realizing it was free came to its senses and dashed off, the direction in which it ran could have been in any other direction except towards my younger brother who was deathly afraid of them. Well the lizard ran towards my younger brother and upon his foot, paused for a second and decided it would take shelter inside his pants leg, that is when my little brother let out a scream so loud you thought he had lost a limb. My older brother realizing what the lizard had done and the trouble he would be in from my dad decided to vacate his presence and retreat to a quieter spot in the back yard. My dad came diving out the door thinking that my younger brother was seriously injured asking what was wrong. All my younger brother could do was point to his pants and say "Wizard daddy, wizard." Finally my dad realized what he meant and fished the lizard out and threw it across the yard as far as he could and then turned to me and siad "How many times have I told you that you are not supposed to be scaring him?" and as he said this he was slipping off his belt. My younger brother had went into the house and was enjoying a popcicle as I took my older brother's punishment. But I did get my revenge.

A few weeks later I happened upon a garter snake sunning itself on a concrete stepping stone along the front yard garden. I managed to sneak up on it and grab it behind its head and carried it to the garage where I found a large jar that I placed it in and after poking a few air holes in the lid, secured the lid on the jar. That evening as my older brother was taking his bath I took the snake from the jar and placed it under the covers on his bed, slid into my bed across the room and waited. Did you know that even eight year old boys could still wet the bed?

Later...

Stories posted here are the exclusive property of the Smiling Pig. No other use or reproduction of the content contained here is permissible without written prior consent.

Whispered Word

She came to me in whispered word

To lament to me her sorrow

She said she cried but no one heard

She cried for lost tomorrows

Tears like a river flow

Stains a heart so sweet

Pain that comes and will never go

Two hearts that will never meet

Smiles that will never be seen

Lips that will never kiss

Love that cuts like a blade honed keen

Tomorrows fallen into the dark abyss

A time that is lost for two

An embrace waiting to be filled

Now realized to never come true

A dream lost time has killed

A path walked with no return

No longer by her side

A love given that was spurned

Her face she tried to hide

To conceal the pain in her eyes

The smile that is lost

The hurt from the final goodbye

The heart that it cost

She came to me on whispered word

She came and shed a tear

She came to say no one heard

She came to hide her fear

Stories posted here are the exclusive property of the Smiling Pig. No other use or reproduction of the content contained here is permissible without written prior consent.